How I overcame low self-esteem and stopped doubting myself
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Here’s my journey to becoming more confident, increasing focus and willpower.
Hello! I’m Maria, and not long ago I was suffering from chronic anxiety, self-blame, and low self-esteem.
Now, that I’m even able to write this letter, is just another proof of my newly rediscovered sense of focus, energy, and willpower.
So, what's my secret? Buckle up, here’s my story:
I used to be one of those people who would always doubt myself. I was constantly overthinking situations and had a hard time accepting myself.
When I needed to really buckle down and get things done, I’d spend hours worrying about the result. And then when I did finally finish the work, it was… subpar.
I felt like there was something wrong with me. Wasn’t I smart enough? Talented enough? Worthy enough?
Faithful to my own self-doubting nature, I doubted that anything could change this situation.
For as long as I can remember, I’ve always had a hard time believing in myself. High school was a nightmare for me. Teachers, students, friends, and family were all so critical. I felt like everything I did was wrong and I couldn’t do anything right.
I always felt that I had something to prove—that if I just worked a little harder and if I just kept pushing myself, I would reach the level of success that I deserved. But there was always something holding me back. And whether it was my self-doubt or anxiety, it was always there, bringing me down.
My college years were no different. It was my final semester, and I needed to write a thesis paper in order to graduate. It was the paper that would determine my entire grade for the course. But as the deadline approached, I found myself doing everything but writing the paper. I felt anxious and guilty about not working on it, but at the same time, I didn’t know how to get myself to actually sit down and write because of a horrible fear of disappointment. So I ended up missing the deadline entirely and failing the course—and having to take it again!
I don’t know about you, but when something like this happens to me, I start feeling like a total failure. I think it’s easy for us to imagine ourselves as failures because we can see all of our mistakes so clearly, and it really hurts.
A never-ending cycle of suffering
This happened over and over in my life: when I started a full-time job, an important project would come up, I’d feel overwhelmed and anxious by it, and then completely freeze up and be unable to do anything at all. By the time the deadline arrived, it was too late—the project was incomplete or unfinished, and I had failed yet again.
Trying to figure out how to solve that problem on my own was like trying to push a boulder uphill. It was so heavy and yet so pervasive that no matter how hard I tried, it always seemed to get in the way and prevent me from reaching my goals.
I guess the feeling of anxiety and depression was the reason why I couldn’t finish my projects, my self-esteem was getting even lower. It was a never-ending cycle.
A lot of women I know assumed I was lazy, but the truth is that I was just terrible at getting stuff done—and it was destroying my self-esteem. If you’ve ever had a similar experience, you know how frustrating it can be.
I couldn’t understand why others seemed to be so good at what they do, and I couldn’t figure out the recipe for success.
I wanted to finish the projects I started with enthusiasm, but in the end, I realized that there was no way out of this vicious circle if I didn’t change something in myself.
Sometimes, it feels like the world is against you. You’re trying to do your best and achieve your goals, but it just feels like nothing ever works out for you.
You want to be confident in yourself and your abilities. You want to accomplish your goals with a sense of purpose and meaning.
But we all have a voice inside us that whispers, “You’re not good enough” “You don’t deserve to be happy” or “That would never work.”
You know that voice. You’ve heard it before. But how do you silence it? How can you get it out of your way and start believing in yourself? How can you start fulfilling your potential and reaching your goals?
Seeking for solution
So one day I decided that life is too short to feel bad about yourself all the time! I was ready for a change, ready to start accepting myself for who I am and reach the goals I’d been putting off for years.
I found a great therapist who was able to help me figure out the reasons for my depression but she couldn’t seem to help me change the way I dealt with the feelings of anxiety and misery that continued to plague me.
The first thing she tried was anti-depressants, but those just made me feel dopey and numb. So then we tried anti-anxiety drugs for a while, but those just made me exhausted all the time—and I still had no idea what to do about all of these feelings that were making it hard to get up in the morning.
I wanted off of the drugs, but she didn’t want me to stop taking them unless I had something else I could rely on instead.
So I started doing my own research. I read all the books. I tried all the apps. Nothing worked for me and soon, I lost motivation to seek further.
A wake-up call
We can tell ourselves we deserve better. We can tell ourselves we are strong and capable. But when it comes down to it, we don’t really believe it—we can’t really believe it, because we see ourselves as weak and incapable of doing something as simple as writing a paper.
But feeling that way doesn’t have to be our reality forever.
And that’s when my sister came to the rescue and showed me a website. It was a quick quiz that you can fill out online in just a few minutes, and she convinced me to answer the questions honestly.
Based on the answers, I received a personalized plan that claimed it would allow me to improve my self-esteem and crush my set goals with tons of focus, energy, and willpower.
To be honest, I was super-skeptical, as nothing else had worked before. But I told myself I had to give it a try anyway for my sister.
The first step of the personalized plan was to identify what was holding me back and take the weight off my shoulders.
Then they helped me come up with a plan for overcoming it. It’s almost like getting a personal trainer for your mental health.
And it worked wonders for me!
Esteem Quest also offered built-in tracking features so I could track my progress as I watched myself improve over time.
I had access to worksheets that helped me down my goals into manageable chunks so I don’t get overwhelmed or discouraged by the scope of what’s ahead.
If you’re struggling with low self-esteem, anxiety, or depression, Esteem Quest can help you learn how to believe in yourself, how to accept and improve yourself — to truly become your best version, even when circumstances say otherwise.
And to think, it all started with a simple quiz!
Click below to take the Esteem Quest initial quiz, and your custom-designed plan will be ready in a matter of minutes.
After that, it’s only a matter of choosing to give it a whirl.
After all, if you’re in a situation like mine, there’s so much to gain and so little to lose by trying.
Best of luck on your journey!
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